Sunday, January 13, 2013

You Know You’re a Peace Corps Volunteer in Samoa When…


The moment you step out of the plane, your camera’s screen and lens fog immediately, due to the humidity.

You witness numerous chickens and one pig get killed for Culture Day. Those animals later become your meal.

A young boy is climbing a coconut tree, with a machete in his hand. Yeah, no big deal!

Showering without flip-flops is a luxury.

Showering with hot water is a treat.

You look forward to Thursday nights because it’s Bingo night, and you know that there will be donuts for sale.

You have to take off your shoes before entering a doctor’s office.

Your host family locks the back door of the house at night. That's the door you go through, to go to the outdoor bathroom. It’s 2 am, and you need to use the bathroom. While deciding if you should wake them up, you notice the bucket that has been in your room since you moved in. Suddenly a thought comes to mind: “Is that why they put the bucket in my room, so I don’t wake them up in the middle of the night?”

Strangers ask where you’re going.

Church bells (and by bell I mean an oxygen tank and stick) wake you up at 5am almost every morning. The bell is a remainder to get up and pray and/or go to morning service. You um, go back to sleep.

Your host sister shows you a freshly caught octopus. That octopus becomes that night’s dinner.

You wash your dishes after you use them, knowing that you’ll have to wash them again before the next meal because they will still attract insects.

During your walk to church, mud gets on the back of your white pulatasi. Once you get home, you secretly wash it in the shower, and hang it to in your fale to dry. Why is it a secret? It’s a secret because it’s Sunday, and any activity (besides going to church, praying, eating and sleeping) is forbidden.

A mosquito flies in your cup of coffee. You scoop it out and continue to drink.

You spray Mortein (insect killer) to kill the ants. Moments later 200+ mosquitoes drop dead. 

While chopping up an onion, a piece falls on the floor. What do you do? Rinse it off, and add it to the chop pile. Food is too valuable here.

You’re constantly checking your wounds to make sure flies aren’t feasting on them. 

An ie lavalava is used for a skirt, a blanket, a towel, a scarf, a tablecloth, a curtain, etc., etc., etc.

While drinking a soda, a wasp decides it wants to share. What do you do? Keep drinking out of the straw, as the wasp is inside the can.

Your windows have mosquito wire, but that doesn’t keep the mosquitoes out.

The bus gets so full, to the point where people sit on strangers’ laps, and people stand, NOT sit, on the bus entry area while the bus is going at full speed down the road. I must add: the buses are door-less. If there’s an automobile accident, those people would be seriously injured.

A cyclone hit two days prior. There is no electricity in the city. People still need to have fun, so where do they go? They go to the bar that’s powered by a generator.

You don’t shower for 6 days because the cyclone caused water to be scarce. The water that’s available is used for flushing toilets and drinking only.

Fifteen+ people pack a truck bed.

You don’t have silverware yet, so you make a spoon, using the metal lid of a can. It was a good idea, until it sliced your lip.

While you’re on break during training class, a chicken decides to lay an egg on your chair.

Your host family tells you to eat more. You do, and then they say that you’re getting fat.

To prevent ants from getting into your food, you use plastic containers to store your food. The same type of container is used for hand washing clothes. Those containers are multi-purpose!

You wonder why your outer ankles are darker than the rest of your skin. You’re convinced they’re just bruised, but after weeks of having “bruised” ankles, you figure it must be something else. Turns out that the bruises wash away—all it takes is some scrubbing (they were just covered in dirt, and insect repellent).

Ants share your bed, and your counter tops, and your windows, and your water filter. They’re everywhere.

Your clothes have been outside “drying” for the last two days, and they’re still wet. Yay, mold!

You discover that lizards chirp.

You have an infection in your toe for 8 weeks already, and it doesn’t look like it’s going to heal anytime soon.

There are visible mold stains on your clothes

Mosquitoes and ants bite you daily.  

You stack up beer crates, using them as a bookshelf.

Samoans insist you must change out of your clothes if they’re wet. They’re convinced you’ll get sick… in 85-degree weather.

A lizard lives in your thatched roof. 

Your mattress is 3in thick. You can fill the bed frame when you’re laying down.

A McDonalds meals cost $26WST ($13USD), but you don’t care because it’s the closest thing to “American” food. Funny thing is, you hardly eat McDonalds at home.

The high-speed internet is prepaid, expensive, and isn’t very “high-speed.” It often freezes, while the usage ticker is still winding down.

A few of these were taken out of a previous blog entry. I thought they’d be a good addition to the list, which I plan on updating periodically… After all, I’ll be in Samoa for 23 more months… It’s bound to get LONG!

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